1. AH! All these soundbites are the perfect way to kick off the new episodes!
2. LA LA LA!!!!
3. “While your comfort dog watches Zoolander 2 on his watch!” LOL
4. Man, it’s like Lauren Graham never stopped playing Lorelai.
5. She seamlessly slips back into character.
6. Alexis Bledel on the other hand is…awkward. Why is she so awkward?
7. “Haven’t done that for a while. Missed you kid.” Okay, I’m emosh.
8. “How long’s it been? Feels like years.” Yep. All the feels!
9. Oh wow, Miss Patty is skinny.
10. That’s too many Bagel Bites for one small-town market.
11. Historically, when people could accurately predict the weather, they’d be tried as a witch.
12. I want to believe in magic, but I think we all know Paul Anka would be dead.
13. Prediction: Paul won’t be entered into the illustrious canon of Rory’s boyfriends.
14. Yep. No one can even remember him.
15. Okay, no one — including Rory — being able to remember Paul is cracking me up.
16. Luke’s unrelenting pride in Rory is so lovely.
17. Reasons I’m not a parent: Being woken up in the middle of the night by tap dancing isn’t “a cute quirk,” it’s just annoying.
18. First mention of “grandpa” and I’m preemptively filled with dread over the inevitable funeral scene.
19. Rory’s FAMED New Yorker piece fits on the back of a menu?!?
20. That said, Luke’s unrelenting pride in Rory is so lovely.
21. (Yes, it bears repeating).
22. “I’m not a breakfast person.” Oh, you never stood a chance Paul.
23. “Order me a tea.” BOY BYE.
24. Michel is gay and has a husband! A million heart eye emojis.
25. This MIA Sookie storyline has me wondering what could have been if Melissa McCarthy committed to return for the entire series.
26. Kirk handing Lorelai a Brita killed me dead.
27. [deep exhale] Funeral flashback [braces self]
28. No one is hugging Emily. I want to hug Emily.
29. Why can’t Lorelai think of one nice thing to say about her father?
30. This seems weirdly cold and out of character.
31. This Emily/Lorelai fight is such a painfully real depiction of familial grief and anger.
32. It’s also reminding me that, as talented as Lauren Graham is as a comedian, she’s even more gifted as a dramatic actor.
33. “I’ve always considered Rory to be a little bit mine.”
34. Luke’s unrelenting pride in Rory is so lovely.
35. IT. BEARS. REPEATING. AGAIN.
36. No matter how many times I see it, Luke without a baseball cap on is like seeing a teacher outside of school — or a dog walking on its hind legs.
37. I am now very uncomfortable hearing Luke and Lorelai talk about having sex and would like mom and dad to stop this now please and thank you.
38. I actually squealed when I heard Paris.
39. Alex Kingston makes everything better.
40. Put “Everything’s Better When It’s Stolen” on the tote bag I use to shoplift oats from Whole Foods.
41. Rory and Logan being international fuck buddies makes all the sense.
42. Luke giving everyone a different fake password to his Wi-Fi is a very on-brand running gag.
43. OK, so I’m having trouble keeping track of the show’s timeline — how much time is passing in between Rory’s visits?
44. Does it matter?
45. I’ve decided it does not.
46. I feel like The Dragonfly Inn logo makes it look like The Driagonfly Inn and I don’t know why I’m realizing this only now.
47. I am very unsettled seeing Emily in a Candie’s T-shirt and jeans.
48. VERY UNSETTLED.
49. Kerry Butler as their therapist! I can’t believe how much time I spent listening to the Broadway Xanadu soundtrack.
50. Taylor may be annoying af, but he obviously runs a really impressive town council given the money surplus they must constantly have to be throwing all these damn town festivals.
51. Sasha!!! The Bunheads alumni cameo count begins here!
52. OMG Mr. Kim does exist!
53. Seeing Jackson without Sookie feels wrong.
54. Rory is trying to write a book by taking handwritten notes and there’s no tape recorder in sight? [Hamilton King George voice] Good luck!
55. Ooof. A “Brexit will never win” joke.
56. First town meeting! Drink!
57. The inaugural Stars Hollow gay pride parade was canceled because there aren’t enough gay people in THAT town? God forbid they try to hold a Black History Month parade…
58. Um, what movie stars Matthew McConaughey, Jennifer Lawrence, Daniel Radcliffe, Jessica Chastain, and Cate Blanchett. Because I will watch it.
59. Solid real-life Paul Anka cameo.
60. “Nobody calls me at night.” Living the dream, Luke.
61. Suddenly thinking about an alternate universe in which Luke and Claire Danes are siblings.
62. Richard leaving Luke money to expand his business is so thoughtful.
63. I miss Richard (I also miss Edward Herrmann).
64. Is it weird that Rory and Paris going back to Chilton feels like I’m also going back to my old high school?
65. They’re going to try and make Rory a new professor at Chilton, aren’t they?
66. Tristan wins for fastest cameo.
67. Wait, that wasn’t even Chad Michael Murray.
68. Liza Weil is absolutely killing me in this bathroom freakout scene.
69. What a legend.
70. High-fives self [see #65].
71. Hello. I would like a sleepy-voiced Matt Czurchy to pick up my calls too. Whom do I speak with about this?
72. No revival series — The Comeback, 24, Gilmore Girls — is complete without a Dan Bucatinsky cameo, it would seem.
73. It’s starting to feel financially impossible for Rory to be taking this many intercontinental flights.
74. Like, let’s really take a second and think about this: She’s had a half-dozen freelance articles published and is flying from London to America like she’s Richard Branson or something.
75. Maybe there should have been a line where they said Rory got all of Richard’s frequent flier miles because short of that… this makes no sense.
76. You know, it was a rocky start in the first episode, but Alexis Bledel’s performance is really coming to life in a beautiful way in Episode 2.
77. MAE WHITMAAAAAAAN!!!!!!
78. Rory beating herself up about having her first one-night stand is making me feel real bad about my sexual history.
79. A whole conversation about having sex with a Wookiee and no one made a “Wookiee Nookie” joke?
80. Ok, I was dubious about this whole “red dress” hunt but Rory does look divine in it.
81. Throwing away three cell phones feels deeply reactionary.
82. I feel like I’ve never seen a bathing suit on Gilmore Girls before.
83. Why is Rory wearing jeans at the pool?
84. Laughed way too hard at that “To Noam is to love him” Chomsky joke.
85. Ginny! Bunhead count: 2.
86. “Fatherhood is going to be a lot of pretending for me” — ilu Michel.
87. Have Lorelai and Rory paid these two child workers? What’s the compensation situation there?
88. There’s really no reason for Sutton Foster to be singing right now but Sutton Foster is currently singing and I really love this show.
89. I can’t take Rory seriously in this hippie headband.
90. The Thirtysomething Gang drinking milkshakes in honor of There Will Be Blood is savage realness.
91. Much like the majority of Smash, this Stars Hollow musical proves that Christian Borle can truly make the worst ideas sparkle.
92. OH MY GOD IS CAROLE KING ABOUT TO SING?!?!?!
93. CAROLE KING IS SINGING!!!
94. Nothing is more distracting than an actor who doesn’t smoke smoking a cigarette.
95. The shirt Jess wears for his dramatic re-entrance really makes the most of Milo Ventimiglia being so swoll now and I would just like to thank everybody involved in making him so swoll now.
96. They have consumed so much brown liquor throughout these three episodes that I feel like I’m about to make some bad decisions.
97. I am not here for this Mysteries of Laura shade, Gilmore Girls. Know. That.
98. The “one week later” chyron seems weirdly extra since the show skips forward in time so regularly as is…
99. Mildly obsessed with the smile that creeps onto Emily’s face every time she realizes that she knows something that Luke and Lorelai haven’t told each other yet.
100. Do you think the people innocently eating at Luke’s while he’s arguing with Lorelai long ago made peace with their dining establishment choices and just accept that sporadic public histrionics come with the territory?
101. Come to think of it, Sporadic Public Histrionics would be a more fitting name for this show than Gilmore Girls.
102. I would watch an entire musical built around the song Sutton Foster is currently singing.
103. Find someone who looks at you the way Lauren Graham looks at Sutton Foster singing.
104. Truly! Bunhead count: 4* (including Sutton; asterisk for Kelly Bishop).
105. In the “book or movie” conversation, I am never “book.”
106. Jason Ritter!!! Don’t mind me, just screaming whenever I see a Parenthood alum.
107. The only thing I like less than hearing Luke say “oops” is seeing Luke in emotional pain.
108. “No story. Just a punchline.” Amy Sherman-Palladino’s writing is so signature.
109. I’m really enjoying Rory’s steampunk acid trip with the Life and Death Brigade.
110. This revival is really making Logan seem like Rory’s dream guy — yes, I know he’s technically engaged to another woman, but Rory hasn’t broken up with whatever-that-bland-man’s-name-is either, so…
111. It’s just dawned on me that this is the final episode and we haven’t seen Jared Padalecki or Melissa McCarthy yet!
112. Please give us a close-up of shirtless Logan!
113. Thank you.
114. Peter Krause?!?! Oh, that’s cute. This is cute. CUTE!
115. Oh, don’t mind me, I’m just hysterically crying on my couch watching Lorelai tell this story about Richard and the mall.
116. “I believe in a former life I was coffee.” Girl, put that on a T-shirt because I will buy one.
117. Oh good, more crying #engaged
118. Aesthetic: Emily Gilmore screaming “bullshit!”
119. If Kiefer Sutherland cameos in this show, I am going to fall all the way out.
120. Christopher: still cute.
121. “Five by five.” Rory just quoted Faith so I am now typing these words from the grave.
122. Could Emily’s stipulations for giving Lorelai money be teeing up the next installment of Gilmore Girls episodes?
123. Gilmore Girls: Nantucket at Christmas, perhaps?
124. Would watch.
126. Man, Jared Padalecki in Season 1 versus today is really a marvel to behold.
127. Cornstarch <3
128. What did we do to deserve Melissa McCarthy?
129. “Still best friends?” Just when the tears stopped.
130. Am I the only one who would be interested in reading Rory’s Gilmore Girls book?
131. Maybe another possible premise for the second series revolves around a movie being made from Rory’s book and it gets super meta (like Scream 3 but good — save for Parker Posey’s Oscarworthy performance).
132. This is gonna end with Jess and Rory together, isn’t it?
133. Oh, this wedding venue is pure magic.
134. I’m sorry for all the unkind things I’ve said about you, Kirk. You did good.
135. Every time Rory or Lorelai says four nice words I think, Are those them?!? THE four words? And then the scene goes on.
136. OH! Those were not the four words I was expecting!
137. Well, two if we’re being honest, but still!
138. Whose baby is it? Logan? The Wookiee?!?!
139. Make more episodes now please and thank you.