The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom is finally out on Nintendo Switch, and players are having the time of their lives with Link’s new rune abilities. From crafting absurdly long bridges to constructing flamethrowing dicks, there’s no shortage of stuff you can create in Link’s latest open-world adventure. In fact, some folks have taken their creativity to the extreme, building planes and tanks to commit all manners of war crimes in Hyrule Kingdom.
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The Week In Games: Return To Hyrule
May 8, 2023
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TotK launched on May 12 as a Switch exclusive to massive critical and commercial success. It’s already one of the highest-rated games on review aggregators Metacritic and Open Critic, and the game is smashing sales records in the UK. According to critics, TotK is not only another masterpiece in Nintendo’s catalog, it’s also an apt swansong for the six-year-old console, a game that pushes the Switch’s limits and looks pretty damn good doing it, too.
Now that it has been out for a few days and players have had the chance to experiment with all of Link’s new gadgets and skills, including the two building skills Fuse and Ultrahand, folks are seeing if they can turn Hyrule Kingdom into a bloodied warzone. And the results are hilarious and wild all in one breath.
The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Warzone
All over the internet, from TikTok to Reddit to Twitter, players are posting their TotK builds. There’s the usual stuff: dicks, paddle boats, more dicks, pick-up trucks, even more dicks—you get the picture. But interspersed between all of the genitalia crafts are people constructing planes, tanks, and giant mechs that look like Gundams or Metal Gears to obliterate Ganon’s minions. Twitter user idonum used Zonai cannons to build an armored vehicle to level an enemy camp, blowing up walls and running Bokoblins over in the process.
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Meanwhile, StickydrawzG tweeted someone else’s build of an orbital strike satellite laser cannon, which was used to wipe out a three-headed dragon. Then there was Twitter user RobFletch1393, who posted a video of a Trojan Horse, explaining that Rehydrated Ganondorf “won’t know what hit him.”
My personal fave, though, is this TikTok compilation tweeted out by angelmendoza. The clip cycles through an evolution of TotK builds, starting with a small car with a couple of javelin-type weapons glued onto the front and an exposed tank that shoots laser beams before ending with a plane capable of dropping bombs on unsuspecting goons. Talk about leveling the battlefield.
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TotK players are really running hog wild in Hyrule Kingdom. While some have gotten stuck in the tutorial area for longer than intended, many have left the Sky Islands to see what else Link can get up to—and it’s a lot! I mean, folks are even torturing the forest spirits Koroks for no discernible reason. It’s fucked, but that’s kind of the beauty of Link’s latest escapade: There’s a nigh limitless amount of potential for wild experimentation and emergent gameplay.